A quick update...

I just worked black friday, immersed in the mass consumerism that has wrongly become the focus of Christmas as people scramble for the deals that, honestly, pop up at least once a month at the mall ANYWAY.  And though I wake up in less than 7 hours for another round of mall merriment and my neck and head are aching- I just had to stop in and update.  There was one purchase I DID make- a 5 foot long, furry, cheetah print pillow for just 10 bucks.  So cuddly.  I think it will be my pregnancy pillow.  And in the spirit of not acquiring too much I forced one of my old ones on my sister who could actually use one.

Saturday's show was GREAT!  And best of all I am now prepared to do any shows that may come up:

 My husband was a pretty big help assuming the role of Art Bitch and taking on all heavily lifting as well as procuring some amazing empenadas for nourishment.   And my friend brought a special delivery of lasagna, donuts, and cider!  Oh yeah....    When not running around for me, he sat patiently reading his book:

I've also recently realized this may not all be due to constipation (see pic below); somewhere in that squishy mass is a baby the size of a prune (which i've been downing at rates rivaling the consumption at your local senior home)

fatso

Now that my inventory is up and the show is over, I've been working on putting all those wonderful items I made online!  Here's a few pics.  I've really got to get to bed now.  Feeling crappy and sort of heartburny.

Upcycled Vintage Jewelry with Freshwater Pearl

Upcycled Bullet Casing Earrings

Traveler's Companion

Awesome Exotic Hood

Designers Downtown Market

This Saturday I'll be set up to vend at a show downtown and it happens to be the same day as the Christmas Parade!

I know it's too early to announce anything, but whatever

So apparently, this pinto bean-sized fellow is chilling out in my uterus which should be about the size of a grapefruit by now:

8 week old internet fetus

I've already devoured so many books and of course spent tons of hours on blogs throughout internet land.  

I've found Google to be my best friend:

wearing nail polish while pregnant

yoga poses not to do while pregnant

how much does labor really hurt (32x)

how big will your boobs get while pregnant (aw yeah!)

morning sickness cures

There is a lot of excitement but also a few, small, personal tortures.   Not being able to scoop cat litter?!  I have FIVE indoor cats and Mount Cat Shit has proven to be a far more arduous endeavor than my poor husband anticipated.  On the rare day I'm home and one of those monsters makes a deposit in the poop bank, I have to go upstairs to escape the horrible smell as I now have a super human nose.

Speaking of torture and poop- I've been craving protein and fruits which is awesome, and yet so very not awesome when I have an 8 hour shift and work in a high end fashion store with other ladies.  Once a day I announce suddenly that I'm going to take a "5-10 minute walk around the mall" for no particular reason and rather than pull that twice a day I later warn coworkers "If you're gonna have to pee any time soon, you'd better go now. Because I'm about to poop!"  Luckily our bathroom is well stocked and as I sit there I preemptively febreeze myself then lysol afterward.  I do prefer the mall toilets as they are far away and somewhat more private but whatever.

I also fart in the dressing rooms.  Take that, rich ladies!

Everyone around me is pretty happy as they gush over my belly and unknowingly pat what is actually probably just a super full colon as I've been eating A TON.  The only "bad"thing I've been eating a lot of is ambrosia salad and chocolate ice cream with cherries, whipped cream, and caramel sauce.  Mmmmmm, actually I think it's about time for my nightly bowl.
yeah, i gotta go now